Woman told to 'rethink her marriage' after she makes confession about her exes

The bride-to-be is worried she's making a mistake (stock photo)

You need to be sure you're ready before you leap into a big commitment like marriage.

It's not uncommon for people to second guess themselves in the days leading up to a wedding. You might find yourself wondering if you're making the right decision, if your partner is really the one for you, and even if you're missing out on something that you'd only find if you stayed single.

That's exactly what one bride-to-be is experiencing, as although she is due to get married to the "man of her dreams" very soon, she's "scared to death" because she's worried she might be making the wrong choice. And, to top it all off, she can't stop reminiscing about her ex-boyfriends.

In a post on Reddit, the woman said she met her fiance on a dating app and thinks he's a "sweetheart", but she can't help comparing him to her two former partners and wondering if she's "settling" for someone who isn't quite perfect.

She wrote: "I can't help but compare him to my past relationships. We're not quite as similar as my last boyfriend and he's not interested in the same things as my first. He's good to me, and we're happy. But I miss the things I had before. Well, we dated for a year and I felt those things didn't matter. We argued, but we worked it out. He's good to me, he's silly. I like his family, he likes mine. Our dreams align enough. We decide to get married and he proposes."

While things were fine between them at first, the woman is questioning everything again now that they're engaged and getting married soon. She's worried she could be "missing something" in her life by getting married now, but also isn't sure if she should bother holding out for the "perfect" man.

"Suddenly everything comes back that I was worried about. I'm terrified," she continued, "We don't have the intellectual conversations I had with my first boyfriend that meant everything, we don't have as much fun as my second boyfriend. But am I self sabatoging? Am I continually self-deluding that there is this perfect man out there who is going to have absolutely everything I want? Or is it just that this boy isn't a perfect fit?

"I already broke up with two really great guys because they weren't 100 hundred per cent perfect. Am I going to do that again, to someone who means so much to me? Just because things aren't perfect? Or am I justified? Is it just cold feet? Do happy couples that last even get cold feet?"

Commenters on the post encouraged the woman to rethink her marriage, with many telling her she seems more attached to the idea of getting married than to her specific partner.

One person wrote: "You're freaking out because your body is warning you. It sounds to me that you are attached to the idea of getting married soon. Imo you won't be ready to decide to marry if you aren't willing to be on your own. Sounds like you need time to build some independence. This will not close your window for love, it will open it much wider."

Another added: "Take your time. Marriage is forever. It's not a marathon competition. When you have time you will get married and it will be forever. Don't rush."

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