My mother-in-law wants us to move in with her - but I have a list of rules she must agree to before that happens

The unnamed wife, from the US, took to Reddit's popular Am I The A**hole threadShe explained she had six rules for her mother-in-law and her boyfriend, both 66 But readers were left bitterly divided in the comments over the list of demands 

A woman has sparked fierce debate after revealing the long list of rules she wants her mother-in-law to agree to before she and her husband move in.

The unnamed wife, from the US, took to Reddit's popular Am I The A**hole thread to shed light on the demands.

She explained how she wanted her mother-in-law and her boyfriend, both 66, to get rid of their dog, never discipline her children and put her as the main deed holder of the house - to name just a few.

But readers were left bitterly divided in the comments.

The unnamed wife, from the US, took to Reddit's popular Am I The A**hole thread to shed light on the demands

She explained how she wanted her mother-in-law and her boyfriend, both 66, to get rid of their dog, never discipline her children and put her as the main deed holder of the house - to name just a few (stock image)

The post, which was shared earlier this week, was titled: 'Am I The A**hole for giving my mother-in-law a list of demands/rules after she asked us to move in with her?'

It began by setting out a list of rules numbered one through six which read: 'She WILL be getting rid of her dog.

'Her and her boyfriend are not to reprimand my children at all and they will be expected to come tell me or my husband if my children are doing something wrong.

'There will be a list of people whom are not allowed at the house. (Their family and their friends).

'Me, my husband and my children WILL be treated with respect at all times and I will not be treated like a child.

'My husband and I will absolutely be put on the deed as the main deed holder before we move in.

'If any of these demands are not held to the highest standard, I will be withdrawing.'

The disgruntled woman then unraveled the difficult family dynamics even further.

Unsurprisingly, the post was soon flooded with comments - with readers left bitterly divided. On the one hand, there were those who argued the woman was not in the wrong

'My mother-in-law is getting up there in age. Not old but her health isn't the best. She has recently asked us to move in with her because she can no longer work, has zero retirement fund and can't get around like she used to.

'She needs help and we are the only ones who can help her. She has until the end of the month to pay off $12k in back taxes before her home goes to foreclosure.

'My mother-on-law by herself is a kicka** woman. I love her to bits. But she's a people pleaser to the extreme and it has absolutely made her fall into situations that I will never be okay with putting myself in.'

Elaborating further, she shared: 'Her boyfriend is 66-year-old "Mason." A felon, due to his continuous drunk driving charges. He just got out of prison last year after six years on the inside and he is already right back in to drinking all day, every day.

'He got drunk one night back eight months ago and decided to go and adopt a five-year-old Rottweiler Mastiff mix and then failed to make any attempt to train the animal.

'It is now food aggressive, kennel aggressive, toy aggressive and resource guards everything. He is aggressive protective over my mother-in-law. So, the dog would have to go. Under no circumstances will I make an exception on this.

'My children are small (one crawling) and that animal will not get the opportunity to maul my children. Dog stays, we do not move in, period.'

Next, she explained: 'Mason also has an old school style of parenting and on more than one occasion has tried to father my children in angry, outdated parenting style ways. Hence why I said neither he nor my mother-in-law will reprimand/discipline any of my children in any way, shape or form.

'I stated my name will be put on the deed prior to moving in because it will be me and my husband forking over the money to save their home and frankly, I don't trust Mason to not try and kick us out after we do so.

'So if we are not put as main deed holder, we will not be moving in and she can lose her home.'

But, on the other hand, there were some who said that she was the 'a**hole' in this situation

The concerned mom justified her other demands as she explained: 'As for the limit on who is allowed at the house: Mason has a family member who is a convicted pedophile (the girl was four years old - he went to prison for 13 years) that he hangs out with often.

'He seems to think that since the man is in a wheelchair, he is now "harmless". Absolutely not. He is not welcome at the home.

'As for them treating us with respect under all circumstances and not treating me like a child: there has been several times where Mason and my mother-in-law have tried making decisions for me and my husband or told us what to do and I will not tolerate it.'

She revealed that she had already presented the list of demands which had been met with resistance.

'Mason and my mother-in-law are both saying that the list makes them feel as though they are children/guests of their own home and feel like I've now decided I'm going to control their lives and have asked to make changes.

'As in, they want to keep the dog and have stated that we will just find a way to keep the dog separate from us (nope).

'Mason also wants his family member to be allowed here but has stated he will keep them in their portion of the house and away from my kids (nope).

'They also feel they should be able to reprimand and discipline my children if they are doing something wrong if it is "within reason" (nope). I told them they can speak to the parent and that's final. I said I'm not budging.'

Other family members have since branded the woman as 'ridiculous' which prompted her to ask if she was the one in the wrong.

Unsurprisingly, the post was soon flooded with comments - with readers left bitterly divided.

On the one hand, there were those who argued the woman was not in the wrong.

One person wrote: 'NTA. It sounds like everything on this list has a very valid reason behind it. It sounds like you would not just be a financial support, but a caretaker too. For that, you definitely need basic boundaries in place.'

Another added: 'NTA. Your responsibility is to your children, and moving in with them sounds like too big a risk to take in my opinion.'

And a third simply commented: 'Not at all - boundaries are important.'

But, on the other hand, there were some who said that she was the 'a**hole' in this situation.

'YTA, for even considering this living arrangement. It it were my wife, and I in this situation, and she said it's either me and mother-in-law/her issues or divorce, I would be on the phone with an attorney so fast, her head would spin,' one wrote.

Another shared: 'YTA for even considering this arrangement. You aren’t responsible for your MIL’s terrible life choices.

'Moving in with them puts your children, finances, and potentially your marriage at risk. Let her file for bankruptcy and move into a senior apartment.'

Someone else explained: 'YTA. For considering moving your vulnerable children in with an active alcoholic.'