I was a trad wife tending to my husband, but I was miserable

A former trad wife is sharing her harrowing journey in a bid to warn other women against the lifestyle as it sees a rise in popularity.

For Jennie Gage, from Arizona, this is a life she knows all too well – but one that the 49-year-old gracefully left behind after realizing that she had become ‘trapped.’

Now, she’s urging young women not to get caught up in the trend, which gets its name from the abbreviated ‘traditional wife.’

‘Do not ever become a trad wife,’ the social media advocate said.

Jennie Gage, 49, grew up in the Mormon church and was taught that women were to stay at home being ‘nurturers’ and not pursue careers

Jennie is trying to warn girls and young woman to not buy into the fiction that they are only cut out to be wives and mothers

‘The greatest tragedy in my story is that I’m smart, capable and hard-working,’ Jennie said of being told she couldn’t pursue her professional dreams

Though she harbored dreams of becoming a lawyer, she was dissuaded from studying pre-law at her religious college

At the age of 20, Jennie tied the knot with her now-ex-husband, with the wedding doubling as their 11th date

Jennie went on to have four kids with her now-ex-husband, and adopted one more kid with him

‘A man is not a plan – he can be your lover, boyfriend, roommate, husband, whatever – but he should never be your financial plan.

‘No adult human should ever be dependent on another adult.

‘The greatest tragedy in my story is that I’m smart, capable and hard-working.

‘It’s a dangerous lifestyle that needs to stop being promoted.’

Jennie was raised in a conservative Mormon family, where all the women were taught to stay at home, and attend to domestic duties and childrearing while the men brought home the bacon.

From a young age, she recalls being told that, as a woman, she was sent to Earth to be a wife and mother – nothing else.

And while this way of life was all she knew, Jennie had a different dream in mind.

‘I had conflicting emotions, as I loved having a big family, but I dreamed about working,’ she said.

‘I had conflicting emotions, as I loved having a big family, but I dreamed about working,’ Jennie admitted of her time as a trad wife

Even as a college student, Jennie was explicitly told by her guidance counselor not to chase her dreams of becoming a lawyer

‘He gave us all the nice stuff: homes, cars and holidays. But I often laid in bed and cried… I longed to be happy and couldn’t understand why I wasn’t,’ Jennie said

‘I went to college and majored in pre-law classes with the hopes of becoming an international trade attorney.

‘When I sat down with my guidance counsellor on the first day, he told me he was afraid that I was taking classes that weren’t right for a girl.

‘I was switched to learning about dating and marriage, as well as child development, which made me furious.

‘Even on dates, when I told boys what I wanted to actually do, they laughed at me.’

In the 1990s, Jennie met her now-ex-husband. The two went on to tie the knot on their 11th date, when she was 20.

Jennie quickly fell into the role of being a housewife, with the pair having four children, now aged 27, 23, 20, and 14.

The mom said: ‘I was doing all the laundry, ironing, cooking, childcare and grocery shopping.

Starting in October 2018, Jenny began the process of leaving the Mormon faith and filed for divorce not long after

Since leaving her husband, she’s also gained a supportive new partner, who has her back when it comes to her working for money outside of the house

‘I now wake up each day with purpose and passion,’ said Jennie

‘He gave us all the nice stuff: homes, cars and holidays.

‘But I often laid in bed and cried. I was stressed and miserable.

‘I longed to be happy and couldn’t understand why I wasn’t.’

Knowing something needed to change, in October 2018, Jenny began the process of leaving the Mormon faith and filed for divorce not long after.

In the years since she’s also gained a supportive new partner, who fully has her back when it comes to building her professional life.

Now, she’s hoping to raise awareness with her story to stop other women from making the same mistake.

‘I had so many fears of being alone, especially with young children, but I had no choice,’ Jenny said.

‘I now wake up each day with purpose and passion.

‘I work three different jobs, which I love, and I’m surviving.

‘I was told that women are to be nurturers, not providers; but I’m proof that message is wrong.’

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