Production of England’s latest disaster sequel put on the back burner
Declan Rice celebrates as Slovakia slump. Photograph: Leon Kuegeler/Reuters
REBOOT IS ON THE OTHER FOOT
Hollywood is beholden to the reboot, the safe bet trumping the imagination of something original. Into cinemas this month arrives an update to the 1996-tornado epic Twister, titled Twisters. How clever. And right until that moment, it seemed as if another sequel to a disaster film was in production, with Gareth Southgate’s England side ready to emulate their cataclysmic defeat by Iceland at the Euros eight years ago.
The storyboard was coming together organically. Cole Palmer was ready to be cast into the Marcus Rashford role of young hotshot sub who should’ve come on earlier. The pundits’ monologues were prepared, first on free-to-air television before the racier versions on their various podcasts. The racists were ready to post on social media disgraces. The post-game vox pops under the Gelsenkirchen night sky were planned. Southgate’s resignation would arrive in the week if not at the post-match press conference, with Lee Carsley’s coronation taking place before the next assignment. Rishi Sunak then urging the nation to get behind Wales for the rest of the tournament.
And then the twist: hey, Jude. It had to be Bellingham, as he intimated himself when mouthing “who else?” after his 95th-minute scissor kick. Not just because of his outrageous talent, but because he actually possesses the ingenuity to write new material, not just a rehash of the same old miserable English exit from a major tournament, prolonging the years of hurt for the men. This is the kid megastar who had his shirt number retired by Birmingham City, who rejected the advances of the Premier League, who suddenly became a false nine in his first season at Real Madrid on the way to Big Cup glory. He decided, as Marc Guéhi flicked the ball on, not to chest it for a first touch of control, but for the trickiest option imaginable. Thus, with a subsequent extra-time winner from Harry Kane, Bellingham’s non-conformity had led England to their fourth consecutive quarter-final.
Does this change the story or simply delay the doom? The post-match inquest may still be on the way. We could still have Declan Rice, Phil Foden and Kyle Walker on Sky Sports €uropean $uper £eague punditry duties in 16 years’ time, wondering why their Golden Generation weren’t able to lift a trophy. It could just be that Keir Starmer’s the one addressing the nation, reminding everyone that while the boys did their best, he too, in case you haven’t heard before, really, really loves football. For now at least, Bellingham’s audacity has granted the dreamers another few days.
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Join Barry Glendenning from 5pm BST for hot MBM coverage of France 1-0 Belgium, while Scott Murray will be on deck for Portugal 2-0 Slovenia at 8pm.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“VAR is fantastic but we don’t know how to use it probably. Decisions are always taken by, let’s say, the same kind of people; they sit there with 10 screens, they have to analyse everything, but from one match to the other they don’t give the same decisions. That is why the players don’t understand it any more, staff don’t know any more, coaches don’t. VAR is great but until we know how to use it properly maybe we have to wait until we use it again” – Georgia coach W1lly Sagnol laments the decision to allow Spain’s equaliser before they went on to cap a furious comeback 4-1 and set up a mouthwatering date with Germany on Friday in the quarter-finals.
EURO 2024 DAILY LETTERS
I happened to watch the clip of a recent performance by a popular English group whose cold play divides opinions. In a fashion similar to the countless criticisms aimed at Gareth Southgate, thousands of fans sang in unison about how they would try to Fix You. Here’s to a bone-igniting quarter-final now” – Peter Oh.
A doff of the cap to the England team for consistently proving throughout this tournament that Napoleon (emperor of France and king of Italy, not the cognac) was right and that it is better to be lucky than good. And it all worked out well for him. Oh …” – Noble Francis.
Send letters to [email protected]. Today’s letter o’ the day winner is … Peter Oh, who wins a copy of Euro Summits: The Story of the Uefa European Championships 1960 to 2016, by Pitch Publishing. Visit their bookshop here. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.
A MESSAGE FROM THE MAN
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RECOMMENDED LISTENING
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ARRIVEDERCI
Italy’s thoroughly deserved exit at the hands of Switzerland on Saturday has prompted some inevitably calm reactions. The front page of Il Corriere dello Sport on Sunday morning lamented “an embarrassment”, with a subhead describing the national team as “incapable of football”. Tuttosport called it a “national failure”, while La Gazzetta dello Sport went with: “Everything to rebuild.” As for Italian broadcaster Sky Sport, commentator Fabio Caressa went with: “The way we played was unacceptable. This match was unwatchable.” As for manager Luciano Spalletti, he lamented his players’ physical condition, the heat and even Serie A winners Inter. “[Their coach] Simone Inzaghi kept training the team in a certain way, because I was in touch with how often Inter were training and so on,” he tooted. “But perhaps … unconsciously you’re not as applied once you’ve won the league so early.” Either way, the Italian FA has doubled down and backed Spalletti to stay in the role.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
France’s Kylian Mbappé is worried that his tender beak will be singled out by Belgium in their last-16 tie. “I think if you’re playing with a broken nose and you haven’t had [it] operated [on] yet, you’re a target,” he winced. “I knew what I was signing up for when I decided that I wasn’t going to go home [for surgery] … if this means someone’s going to hit my nose, so be it. It’s already broken.”
Bruno Fernandes reckons a humbling defeat by Slovenia in a March friendly means they will be “on their toes” for their last-16 tie against the same side. “We need to change [after the defeat by Georgia], we need to do things differently to make sure we get a positive result,” he blabbed.
Meanwhile, Slovenia midfielder Adam Gnezda Cerin isn’t ready to go home yet. “It is a new milestone for the national team [but] we are not done,” he soothed. “[The] match will be a beautiful evening for everyone.”
Luis de la Fuente had the opportunity to say some nice things about Georgia after they were given a scare by them. But nope: “We created many chances and it could have been 8-1 which would have been normal,” he roared. “We know this next game [against Germany] could have been a final at a World Cup. It’s a great rival we are going to face.”
And an England fan who gave us a cracking lead image on Wednesday’s Euro 2024 Daily, has denied falling asleep during the 0-0 draw with Slovenia. “The nap was two and a half hours before kick-off,” roared Freddie Hahn, who said being the father of a one-year-old made him extra tired so he wanted to “get some peace and quiet wherever I can”. Fair enough.
STILL WANT MORE?
The Age of Gareth lives on, writes Barney Ronay, after watching England teeter this close to a humiliating exit. Meanwhile, Jonathan Liew lets us have a peek at what would have been written had Jude Bellingham not scored that goal, Jacob Steinberg dishes out some ratings and Paul MacInnes reckons there is a truce between Southgate and the fans … for now.
Ruthless Rodri crushed Georgia’s fairytale. It’s Jonathan Wilson on Spain’s “schoolteacher” in midfield.
The Italian inquest has begun, reports Nicky Bandini.
Golden Boot! Golden Boot! Golden Boot!
And Ralf Rangnick’s club ethos is fuelling Austria’s push to go deep at the Euros, as Nick Ames explains.
BEYOND THE EUROS
Dan Ashworth is finally free to don his suit at Manchester United after compensation was agreed with Newcastle United.
Meanwhile, fresh off Birmingham’s relegation to League One, goalkeeper John Ruddy has completed a move to Newcastle.
In a PSR deadline day of sorts, Douglas Luiz is doing one to Juventus from Aston Villa for £42m among a host of eye-watering moves.
Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall to Chelsea: £30m. Omari Hutchinson to Ipswich: £22m.
And Crystal Palace have signed Japan attacking midfielder Daichi Kamada after his contract with Lazio expired.
MEMORY LANE
Euro 2000 in Brussels, where this bus stop was turned into a football-themed goal. Sometimes it’s just about the small things.