‘He has quit talking to me’: My father, 83, suffers from hoarding disorder and dementia. Do I have a right to intervene?

‘He has quit talking to me’: My father, 83, suffers from hoarding disorder and dementia. Do I have a right to intervene?

Dear Quentin,

My father lives in Utah and I live in Washington state. I am his only child. My dad doesn’t have a will or trust. He suffers from hoarding disorder, antisocial disorder and dementia. He has quit talking to me and won’t tell me why. I’ve had the police do a welfare check.

What can I do to ensure he’s safe and not in any danger? Do I have a right to intervene? I want to do what’s right and ethical as his child. What rights do I have to protect his estate from the state taking everything upon his death? He’s 83 years old now.

Feeling Powerless

Dear Feeling,

You are the opposite of powerless.

Your father is grappling with a lot of mental-health issues. Cognitive decline can change a person’s personality, resulting in sudden mood swings, becoming withdrawn or suspicious of other people, and even becoming more outgoing than usual. It’s an unpredictable condition.

Try not to take anything he does or says at this point personally, and focus on getting him the help he needs. As you may be aware, dementia is a symptom rather than a disease itself. In fact, there are over 100 diseases that could cause symptoms consistent with dementia.

Alzheimer’s disease is the most common type of dementia, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Approximately 5.8 million people in the U.S. have Alzheimer’s and related dementias, which includes 5.6 million people age 65 and older, the CDC says.

Hoarding disorder is recognized as a mental-health condition and may potentially be related to other neuropsychiatric disorders, including obsessive-compulsive disorder. Your father’s constellation of conditions will make this process a sensitive and possibly difficult one.

Guardianship vs. conservatorship 

Each state has its own rules for guardianships and conservatorships, but there are key differences between the two. In Utah, guardians are appointed by the court to provide for the physical welfare of a person, while conservators, who are also court-appointed, oversee the financial affairs of the ward.

“A guardian is typically a family member, friend, or fiduciary appointed by the court,” according to this guide from Kathie Brown Roberts PC. A protected person typically does not have the ability to make decisions about their own welfare due to illness, age or even substance abuse.

“In fact, in our state, limited guardianships/conservatorships are actually preferred,” the Salt Lake County, Utah-based law firm adds. In California, meanwhile, conservatorships can cover everything from healthcare to finances. (Perhaps the most infamous recent case was the one involving Britney Spears.)

While guardianship does attempt to maintain the protected person’s independence, it should only be considered in appropriate cases, Kathie Brown Roberts adds. “In fact, in our state, limited guardianships/conservatorships are actually preferred.”

Living out of state

It would be difficult to carry out all of your responsibilities as conservator if you are living nearly 1,000 miles away in Washington state. You could transfer a guardianship or conservatorship from Utah to another state, but you would have to petition the Utah district court for permission.

To apply to be a conservator, file a petition with the probate court in the county where your father lives and detail all the responsibilities, powers and duties you intend to take on for your father, in addition to an actual plan for your father’s care.

The probate court will schedule a hearing at which you and other interested parties, in addition to the ward — that is, your father — can give evidence. Prospective guardians must prove the ward is legally incompetent, which could be due to illness, age or substance abuse.

You have other work to do, too. The Utah Code of Judicial Administration 6-501 states that you must take a test regarding your authority, ability and responsibilities before becoming a conservator, and you must also file a Certificate of Completion with the court.

It’s not an easy process. Take it one step at a time.

April is National Financial Literacy Month. To mark the occasion, MarketWatch will publish a series of “Financial Fitness” articles to help readers improve their fiscal health, and offer advice on how to save, invest and spend their money wisely. Read more here.

The Moneyist regrets he cannot reply to questions individually.

Previous columns by Quentin Fottrell:

‘He was recently taken to the hospital’: My elderly neighbor gave me power of attorney. Can his estranged daughter object?

‘Punishing myself would not help’: My credit card was stolen — the thief revealed lots of nasty surprises about my finances

‘She doesn’t like to rock the boat’: My mother will spend millions taking care of my aging stepfather. What can I do?

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