Hayden Panettiere says 'traumatizing' Nashville storylines mirrored her sobriety and custody battles: 'I felt like I was acting out my own life'

Hayden Panettiere has said her ‘traumatizing’ Nashville storylines mirrored her real-life sobriety and custody battles – leading her to feel like she was ‘acting out her own life.’

The actress, now 34, played Juliette Barnes in the show from 2012-2018 – and claimed ‘straight from the beginning’ her storylines were strikingly similar to her own life.

Panettiere, who spent years struggling with substance abuse issues and postpartum depression, handed over full custody of daughter Kaya, now nine, to ex fiancee Wladimir Klitschko – which she says also became a storyline.

Speaking to The Messenger, she said: ‘Straight from the beginning it was like, I’m dating a football player, Juliette dates a football player

‘And then they turned her into an alcoholic. Then, they turned to her leaving her daughter and going to this crazy [place] in Europe,. And it was very obvious … they weren’t doing their homework. They weren’t creating new story lines.

Hayden Panettiere has said her ‘traumatizing’ Nashville storylines mirrored her real-life sobriety and custody battles – leading her to feel like she was ‘acting out her own life’ (seen 2023)

The actress, now 34, played Juliette Barnes in the show from 2012-2018 – and claimed ‘straight from the beginning’ her storylines were strikingly similar to her own life

‘They were just looking at my life and going, “Oh, let’s just take what she’s going through and put our little spin on it. And then, ta-da! It’s done and done.’

She added filming was ‘very traumatizing, I felt like I was acting out my own life.’

Panettiere previously revealed that she had started abusing drugs and alcohol when she was just 15 years old – and that her addiction spiraled out of control while she was battling postpartum depression after Kaya’s birth in 2014.

The actress turned to the bottle to help deal with postpartum depression and she described the experience as being characterized with feelings of ‘extreme hopelessness.’

Her low mood was compounded by the recurring effects of a former neck injury that led her to also use opioids.

When she entered rehab in 2015 she said it was her idea: ‘I was the one who put myself in the first treatment center. I was drowning.’

Upon turning 30, the household name found herself in another 12-step program, where participants are encouraged to embrace a life of complete abstinence from all mind altering substances, including alcohol.

Panettiere, who spent years struggling with substance abuse issues and postpartum depression , handed over full custody of daughter Kaya , now nine, to ex fiancee Wladimir Klitschko – which she says also became a storyline

She admitted she was horrified by a conversation with her former partner when he revealed that their child kept asking to call other women ‘Mommy’

‘My body was like, “enough,”‘ she explained. ‘I hit 30. My face was swollen. I had jaundice. My eyes were yellow. I had to go to a liver specialist. I was holding on to weight that wasn’t normally there. My hair was thin and coming out in clumps.’

After spending years struggling with substance abuse issues, Hayden signed over full custody of Kaya to Klitschko in 2018, but in 2022 has claimed that it was ‘not’ a mutual agreement. She has been sober since 2021.

She admitted she was horrified by a conversation with her former partner when he revealed that their child kept asking to call other women ‘Mommy’.

Speaking on Facebook Watch show Red Table Talk, Hayden said: ‘I also remember her dad [Klitschko] calling me and telling me Kaya’s going around and asking other women if she can call them mommy.’

She described how she felt in the moment after. ‘My breath hitched and my heart stopped, and he was laughing. He thought this was funny and it was horrifying to me.’

‘He didn’t get it, as opposed to me, who saw that’s a trauma reaction. That’s a cry for help.’

Then she explained, ‘I said immediately “Can I talk to my daughter?” and when I asked her about it she went into goo-goo ga-ga speak, like just talking gibberish.’

‘I never before heard her do that. It was a trauma that she was experiencing, me not being around.’

Hayden suggested that her ex Wladimir ‘doesn’t understand’ the lasting impact Hayden’s absence could have on Kaya

Hayden suggested that her ex Wladimir ‘doesn’t understand’ the lasting impact Hayden’s absence could have on Kaya.

She added: ‘As much as I have tried to explain how much she needs her mom and how it’s going to rear its ugly head when she’s older later and it could turn into anger, depression, sadness, but it’s going to be trauma. You can explain it to someone who doesn’t understand that concept or believe it until you’re blue in the face.’

Panettiere’s return to the screen has been overshadowed by the death of 28-year old brother Jansen in New York City on February 19 2023. 

The actor died of aortic valve complications stemming from an enlarged heart, but despite her grief the actress has remained committed to recovery.

‘A big part of my therapy has been living in forgiveness,’ she noted. ‘A step in the 12-step program is making amends.

‘If somebody wants to be a good person and to be the best version of themselves, they can choose to do that.’