Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU

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Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

There are a lot of things that Peter Quill is not. He isn’t the most honest individual. His loyalty can’t always be trusted. He isn’t grateful, secure, or a good team player. Overall, the man we’ve come to know and love as Star-Lord isn’t exactly a model of virtue. The one thing that Quill most definitely is, though, is a fountain of great quotes.

Every time Quill opens his mouth, there’s a good chance that whatever comes out will be worth repeating. This doesn’t mean everything he says is predictable, though. The character — brought to life by some of Chris Pratt’s finest acting — takes his fellow humans in a variety of different emotional directions. Sometimes Star-Lord’s quotes are epic. Other times they’re loathsome. Often, they’re funny. And every so often, he’ll drop an emotional tear-jerker from out of nowhere.

With appearances in both “Guardians of the Galaxy” movies and two “Avengers” films, there is a growing number of top-notch Star-Lord quotes floating out in the superhero ether. We’ve sorted through the collection and picked out the most noteworthy lines of them all. Here are the most memorable quotes Star-Lord has uttered in the hallowed multi-versal halls of the MCU.

'Smushed it with a stick'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Even at a young age, Peter Quill had a way of saying things that stick in the mind — and in this case, it’s one of those sobering lines that shows us why Quill deserves to fall on the “hero” side of the ledger.

The first “Guardians of the Galaxy” film opens way back when Quill is a youngster, before he’s left his beloved planet of Missouri. When little Peter is brought in to see his mother on her death bed, she sees that he has a black eye and asks why he’s been fighting with the other boys. His response is, “They killed a little frog that ain’t done nothing. Smushed it with a stick.”

This line shows off multiple aspects of the character in just a couple of seconds. First, we see that Quill is a born fighter. He isn’t afraid to take a punch — a textbook requirement for any MCU hero. Second, we see a boy who isn’t afraid to stand up for the helpless, even if it’s just a frog. In the universe-sized superhero playground that will define the rest of his career, the fact that Quill is willing to fight for the life of someone or something else, even if it isn’t human, is a defining element in his evolution as a Marvel hero.

It’s ironic in hindsight that his mom follows up this line with the reply that Peter is “so like his daddy,” because, yeah … he’s definitely not.

'Star-Lord, man. Legendary outlaw?'

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Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

The first time we see Peter Quill all grown up, he’s paying a visit to the abandoned planet of Morag in search of the mysterious Orb. We see the slapstick hero dance his way to a ruined tomb, where he finds the Orb and uses his fancy gadgetry to extract it from its protection, “Indiana Jones” style. Everything is going swimmingly … until Korath the Pursuer and his minions arrive to spoil the party.

Holding Quill at gunpoint, Korath demands to know his identity. At first, the hero says that he’s Peter Quill, which is true enough, even if it means nothing to his captors. But then, as Korath and his crew prepare to leave, Quill says, “Hey, you know what? There’s another name you might know me by. Star-Lord.” Korath, in genuine confusion, replies “Who?” A frustrated Quill responds, “Star-Lord, man. Legendary outlaw?” After this, Quill takes out Korath’s soldiers and nearly takes down the Kree legend himself.

The quote is the perfect way to sum up Quill’s half-legendary, half-irrelevant status in the MCU. The dude is seriously important in saving the lives of millions of individuals. He’s the leader of the Guardians of the Galaxy, and the heart and soul of the team. Even so, his status as “Star-Lord” often goes by the wayside compared to the other big-wig names that surround him.

'I didn't know how this machine worked'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Star-Lord is fearless, smart, and occasionally heroic. But he’s also irreverent. Like, really irreverent. This blatant disrespect and mockery of authority are on full display when the hero first meets most of the rest of his future superhero team on Xandar.

They’re there for multiple reasons. Gamora and Star-Lord are pursuing the Orb — albeit with different goals. Rocket and Groot are bounty hunting. When the four characters cross paths, they end up in a raucous chase that ends in the hands of the Nova Corps. After their arrest, the group is brought to Nova Headquarters, where they’re individually processed.

When it comes time for Star-Lord’s turn, the snarky outlaw pretends to turn a small crank with one hand while his middle finger slowly rises on the other hand as it’s “cranked” up. Inevitably, Quill finds himself flipping off the officers, at which point he says with surprise, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know how this machine worked.”

This causes one of the agents to chuckle, but the fellow behind him is clearly displeased. He responds by saying “What a bunch of a-holes,” and follows that up with “Transport all four to the Kyln.” Chances are the gaggle of rabble-rousers would have ended up at the notorious prison anyway, but there’s no doubt that Quill’s disrespect doesn’t help their case. Then again, it definitely gives credence to the whole “famous outlaw who doesn’t care about the law” schtick.

'I had to transfer him 30,000 units!'

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Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

When Star-Lord and his new friends band together to break out of the Kyln, their plan is laid out by Subject 89P13, aka Rocket. The abrasive raccoon informs everyone else what they’re going to do, and what they need to do it. Rocket’s shopping list includes one of the security guards’ arm bands, a quarnyx battery … and a random dude’s prosthetic leg.

Groot kicks things off by proactively removing the battery and setting off the alarms. The rest of the group scatters, with Quill working overtime to track down that leg. When they reconvene at the watchtower in the middle of the prison, Quill gives us a double dose of quotable glory.

The first part comes when Gamora asks why the hostile Drax is coming along. Quill responds that they promised Drax could stick by Gamora’s side until he kills her boss. He ends the response with the gem “And I always keep my promises, when they’re to muscle-bound whack-jobs who will kill me if I don’t.”

Quill then proudly hands over the leg, only to find that Rocket didn’t really need it. He was just amused by the thought of its owner hopping around without the synthetic appendage. Shocked at being suckered into doing something so stupid, Quill exclaims, “I had to transfer him 30,000 units!” The whole scene is priceless, and a great reminder of how Star-Lord sticks to selective commitments — no matter the cost — when the stakes are high enough.

'You know what I see? Losers'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

As the first “Guardians of the Galaxy” approaches its climactic ending, the newly forged superhero team finds itself facing the overwhelming forces of Ronan the Accuser, his massive one-ship fleet, and an Infinity Stone. It’s a seemingly impossible task and one that can only be accomplished by a bunch of … losers.

As the Guardians discuss the insurmountable job in front of them, Star-Lord steps in with one of his first inspirational leadership speeches. But if the audience is anticipating an emotionally uplifting, Captain America-esque exhortation, they don’t get quite what they expected.

Instead, Quill kicks things off with the opening line, “I look around at us. You know what I see? Losers.” This draws glances from all around the room, causing the expert orator to quickly pivot. “I mean, like, folks who have lost stuff. And we have. Man, we have. All of us.” He goes on to recover and rally the team to make a final stand against Ronan, which is great. But the shaky start definitely sets the bar low when it comes to Star-Lord’s sub-par rhetorical abilities.

'I'm distracting you, you big turd blossom'

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Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Peter Quill never lets things get too serious, even when the situation is, well, very serious. Case in point: the end of the first “Guardians of the Galaxy” film. As the Guardians, Ravagers, and Xandarians battle Ronan the Accuser’s fleet, they manage to bring Ronan’s flagship, the Dark Aster, crashing down onto the surface of Xandar itself.

This event seems to be the end of Ronan’s genocidal plans and the presumptive doom of the villain himself. Infused with the strength of the Power Stone, however, Ronan survives the crash and comes stalking out of the wreckage to the terror of everyone around him — including the nearby Guardians of the Galaxy.

Fortunately, the team springs into action. Rocket starts to work on a scavenged Hadron Enforcer that Drax ultimately uses to blow up Ronan’s Cosmi-Rod and save the day. Before that can happen, though, Rocket needs a little time — even intergalactic geniuses require at least a few seconds — and Star-Lord buys him that time with a little dance-off to the tune of himself singing the Five Stairsteps classic “O-o-h Child.”

The disruptive event completely throws off the serious mood, and Ronan looks bewildered, to say the least. After asking Quill what he’s doing for the second time, the hero replies, “I’m distracting you, you big turd blossom.” The calm-yet-saucy response is the perfect wisecrack for a hero who also doubles as the greatest barely-known outlaw the universe has never seen.

'Well of course I have issues! That's my freaking father!'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

“Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2” splits up the team and follows them through a variety of different storylines, with the end result being that there’s a little less Quill overall. He’s also responsible for carrying less of the film’s comedy — new additions like Mantis and Baby Groot help take care of that while Peter goes through the emotional roller coaster of meeting his long lost dad (who, it turns out, killed his mom). As a result, “Vol. 2” is a little light on memorable Quill quotes.

That said, there’s one Star-Lord moment in the second film that needs to make the list. Not long after Quill’s father, Ego, reveals his true motivations — and the fact that he plans on using Star-Lord as a glorified battery — Yondu, Mantis, and the rest of the Guardians come crashing to the rescue, flying right into Ego’s home and temporarily burying the cosmic god under the ship’s hull. Quill climbs aboard and starts arguing with Yondu while everyone tries to get the ship fired up and free from the electrified clutches of the Living Planet.

As the pair quibble, Rocket mentions that “You people have issues.” At that moment, Ego appears in a ghastly, semi-humanoid form in front of the ship, and Quill shouts, “Well of course I have issues! That’s my freaking father!” The line may be laced with sarcasm, but it doesn’t change the fact that he has a point.

'Stop massaging his muscles'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Quill’s insecurities lead to some of his least desirable qualities, but also some of his best lines. This is never on better display then in “Avengers: Infinity War,” when the Guardians run into Thor as he floats through space, half-dead.

The group brings the unconscious Thor onboard and start to study him, leading to a string of lines admiring his god-like physique. Naturally, this encourages Drax to point out that Quill is a boy compared to Thor’s manly qualities, and Rocket and others add that their fearless leader has put on some weight. Feeling threatened on multiple fronts, Quill puts his defenses up and mentions that he’s going to get a bowflex and some dumbbells and commit to a new exercise regimen.

Once Thor wakes up, Quill hilariously tries to one-up everything the Asgardian says and does, even lowering his voice to try to imitate the “god-man.” But the most quotable line in the scene has to be when Gamora picks up Thor’s limp arm and comments on his incredible muscles. “Stop massaging his muscles,” an irked Quill demands. The one-liner serves as the perfect microcosm for all of Quill’s insecurities. It also, once again, begs the question, how on Earth (or off it) is this guy the one calling the shots for this group?

'That nutsack of a chin'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Star-Lord may not have a ton of screen time in the third Avengers film (who does?) but he definitely makes the most of it, especially when it comes to quotable lines. When his portion of the divided Guardians gang hunts down Thanos on Knowhere, the Titan is ready for their arrival. He captures Gamora and then interdimensionally slices and dices Drax and Mantis with the Reality Stone.

This leads to a showdown between a gun-toting Quill and an Infinity Stone-wielding Thanos. Even with the deck clearly stacked against him, our hero’s plucky personality comes bubbling out — pun intended — in a string of quotable material.

The first thing he says as he confronts Thanos is “Let her go, Grimace,” referencing the infamous McDonald’s villain. Thanos then calls him Gamora’s boyfriend, to which Quill responds, “Like to think of myself more as a Titan-killing, long-term booty call.” He follows this up with the utterly perfect, “I’m gonna blow that nutsack of a chin right off your face.” Even under pressure, Star-Lord just can’t stop the rest of us from busting a gut.

'I'm not from Earth. I'm from Missouri'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Peter Quill may grow up on a Ravager ship and spend his life wandering through the galaxy, but at the end of the day, he knows that he’s human. From his cassette tapes to his ’80s callback lines, the character is well aware that he’s from the greatest planet in the galaxy, and in “Avengers: Infinity War,” he lets some fellow humans in on that little secret.

As Thanos tears across the cosmos in pursuits of the six Infinity Stones, a detachment of both the Guardians and the Avengers make their way to the villain’s home planet of Titan in the hopes of taking him down. This leads to a scuffle when the two groups unexpectedly cross paths, each assuming that the other is working for the Mad Titan. As they hold one another at gun-point, they slowly start to figure out that they’re mistaken.

Finally, when Tony Stark, aka Iron Man, states that Quill is from Earth, the Guardian corrects the Iron Avenger by saying, “I’m not from Earth. I’m from Missouri.” The quick line underscores Quill’s self-made brand of humanity. Forged in the fires of an alien vessel and refined by a life spent with countless other alien species, when you break it down, Quill doesn’t really know much about what it’s like to be on Earth … at least until he shows up for the final showdown against Thanos in “Avengers: Endgame.”

'Don't call us plucky'

Most Memorable Star-Lord Quotes In The MCU
Marvel Studios

Not long after the Guardians and the Avengers meet on Titan, we see them observing the desolate planet and trying to make a plan. They still can’t get any traction when it comes to working together, though, and Stark finally decides that being diplomatic might work better than insulting one another. He asks “Mr. Lord” to gather up his people. The deferential peace offering works, and Quill absurdly informs Stark that “Mr. Lord” isn’t necessary and Star-Lord is fine.

In the conversation that follows, we get a triple dose of Quill quotability. It kicks off when Stark starts to tell them that they need to coalesce, adding, “Because if all we come at him with is a plucky attitude —” At which point, Star-Lord cuts him off and says, “Dude, don’t call us plucky. We don’t know what it means.”

From there, Quill launches into a critique of Stark’s plan, stating that “I like your plan. Except it sucks, so let me do the plan and that way it might be really good.” After discussing their dancing defeat of Ronan, debating over whether or not “Footloose” is the greatest movie ever, and exchanging Flash Gordon compliments, we get a third endlessly quotable line when Quill says, “Don’t forget, I’m half human. So that 50% of me that’s stupid … that’s 100% you.” From beginning to end, Star-Lord’s interactions with the Avengers bring out some of the best one-liners of his universe-saving career.

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