'This is worse than residential school'

Loretta Saunders. CONTRIBUTED

ST. JOHN’S, N.L. — Miriam Saunders knows the pain of losing a child — she has lost two. Her daughter, Loretta Saunders, was murdered 10 years ago, on or around Feb. 13, 2014. Loretta’s murder, along with other missing and murdered Indigenous women and girls, eventually led to the National Inquiry into Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women and Girls.

In the past 10 years, Miriam says, she has lost more than just a daughter.

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“I’m a stay-at-home grandma/mom. I had to quit my job. I was told I needed to quit my job by my son Michael’s doctor, for me to take care of him,” says Miriam.

She says her son, Michael Saunders, struggles with mental illness and is now in adult protection in St. John’s.

“My son had a lot of issues after we lost Loretta and plus Delilah, plus his grandmother and his uncle that he was close to. And things got really, really bad,” Miriam said.

“This is worse than residential school. I was in residential school. I was never treated the way that boy is treated. My residential school is nothing compared to what he’s going through.”

Clayton Saunders and Miriam Saunders, the father and mother of murder victim Loretta Saunders, at Supreme Court in Halifax after jury selection in April 2015. SALTWIRE FILE PHOTO

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Miriam says Loretta would have been a major support for the family.

“Loretta used to help me with Michael. And if she was here, we wouldn’t have lost my son because she would’ve been a lawyer. She was everything to Michael. She was a big inspiration,” says Miriam.

She says Loretta’s own life was not smooth or steady. She says Loretta’s trouble started when she moved to St. John’s for a youth program.

“She went to St. John’s and got into the drugs and drinking. Eventually she found her way to the streets of Montreal. We had to pay her way back (to Goose Bay),” says Miriam.

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Eventually, Loretta returned to Goose Bay, but later moved to Hopedale.

“She came back home. She couldn’t keep clean. She moved to Hopedale to get clean and get her education,” says Miriam.

Loretta eventually did end up getting clean.

“She did her upgrade and went to Nova Scota for school. She wanted to be a lawyer. She had these people move in with her after. I told her, ‘Loretta these people could be murderers, you don’t know nothing about them,’” says Miriam.

Delilah Saunders leaves court in Halifax in April 2015 after victim impact statements for sentencing in the murder of her sister, Lorretta Saunders. SALTWIRE FILE PHOTO

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Loretta’s roommates did murder her. She was killed over late rent payments. Loretta was pregnant at the time. Miriam says the courts should have counted her unborn child as a victim.

“That baby was already growing in her for three months. It was life in her body. And then the justice system says it’s not. That child suffered in her. I lost a child, but also a grandchild. I wonder what her child would’ve been like.”

Miriam says little has changed with the police since Loretta’s murder. Another one of her daughters, Delilah (Diem) Saunders, died in 2021 while trying to battle addiction and substance abuse.

Miriam says the treatment of her son is another prime example of what’s gone wrong.

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“I don’t think anything has changed. They don’t do anything about missing or murdered girls anymore. And nothing about rape victims. They don’t even treat my son right,” she said.

“It’s been 10 years, but everything’s still the same with the police and how they treat this stuff. I do see organizations reaching out. But nothing has changed with police. I think, with what people go through now, this is worse than residential schools.”

Miriam says things have been getting difficult for her.

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“I’ve turned to drinking in the past. I’ve been suicidal. I don’t know what I will do. I’m just staying for my grandchild. I’ve got to take care of him.”

Miriam says her struggles will be with her for the rest of her life.

“Not a day goes by when I don’t think about Loretta. That girl was everything for me. And then I lost Delilah. And now Michael is gone away. I just wish Loretta was here.”

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Sanuda Ranawake is a Local Journalism Initiative reporter covering Indigenous and rural issues.

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Sanuda Ranawake, Local Journalism Initiative Reporter, The Telegram