MAUREEN CALLAHAN: After Baldwin's charged again, fake-Spanish Hilaria parades for the paps in fishnets - and Alec demands a speedy trial to suit him... is there no indignity this malignant couple WON'T exploit?

How you say in English… total liability?

Two days after news broke that Alec Baldwin will be re-charged with involuntary manslaughter in the accidental shooting death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, his fake-Spanish wife Hilaria took to the streets of New York, scantily-clad in 30-degree weather.

Truly, there is no indignity that these two won’t exploit. All attention is good attention to the Baldwins, it seems.

And so, with snow still on the ground, Hilaria paraded for the paparazzi, a cohort her husband otherwise hates.

She wore a tiny black mini-skirt, fishnet tights, patent leather stiletto heels, a metallic motorcycle jacket slung over her shoulders, a T-shirt emblazoned with the cartoon superhero ‘She-Ra, Princess of Power’ — clearly how she sees herself — and ridiculous, ski-goggle sized eyewear.

It was a demented, dated replay of early-aughts staged pap strolls.

Two days after news broke that Alec Baldwin will be re-charged with involuntary manslaughter in the accidental shooting death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, his fake-Spanish wife Hilaria took to the streets of New York, scantily-clad in 30-degree weather. Truly, there is no indignity that these two won’t exploit. All attention is good attention to the Baldwins, it seems.

She wore a tiny black mini-skirt, fishnet tights, patent leather stiletto heels, a metallic motorcycle jacket slung over her shoulders, a T-shirt emblazoned with the cartoon superhero ‘She-Ra, Princess of Power’, and ridiculous, ski-goggle sized eyewear. It was a demented, dated replay of early-aughts staged pap strolls.

Here came 40-year-old Hilaria — the one-time Rachel Dolezal of the Hamptons — sauntering slowly, the cameras clicking away as she carried on a suspiciously loud, stilted conversation on her cell.

‘Oh, that’s so nice!’ she exclaimed. ‘I’m so happy to hear that’.

Hear what, exactly?!

That her 65-year-old husband, the father of her seven children, could face prison time? That his legal fees are surely mounting? That they are already on track to becoming the biggest pariahs of 2024?

Reader, I beg of you: Watch the video for yourself.

Hilaria, née Hillary Hayward-Thomas from Boston, still speaks with that phony Spanish accent.

¡Ay caramba!

If there was ever a time to go to ground, to shut up and ensconce yourselves in one of your luxury properties, now would be it.

Instead, these two are courting even more press. They are trailed by a camera crew led by Kennedy scion Rory Kennedy, sister of the very problematic presidential contender Bobby Jr., shooting what looks like a reality series.

Imagine the pitch: What happens when a rage-a-holic actor accidentally kills a colleague, injures another one, denies any and all responsibility, then takes to social media with a delusional esposa who can’t stop slinging babies across her chest?

Working title — ‘Hilaria Ensues’!

All this comes as Baldwin’s lawyers demanded that he is ‘entitled to a fair and speedy disposition of the charges to minimize public vilification’.

Too late for that, Alec.

If there was ever a time to go to ground, to shut up and ensconce yourselves in one of your luxury properties, now would be it. Instead, these two are courting even more press. They are trailed by a camera crew led by Kennedy scion Rory Kennedy, sister of the very problematic presidential contender Bobby Jr., shooting what looks like a reality series.

Imagine the pitch: What happens when a rage-a-holic actor accidentally kills a colleague, injures another one, denies any and all responsibility, then takes to social media with a delusional esposa who can’t stop slinging babies across her chest?

All this comes as Baldwin’s lawyers demanded that he is ‘entitled to a fair and speedy disposition of the charges to minimize public vilification’. Too late for that, Alec. (Pictured: Halyna Hutchins).

Take a look at the most damning parts of these new charges, as outlined by New Mexico prosecutors in their statement of probable cause.

Recall, too, that Baldwin wasn’t just an actor, but a producer of the film in question, ‘Rust’.

In other words, he shared responsibility for on-set safety.

‘Statements and evidence show Baldwin was not present for required firearms training prior to the commencement of filming,’ the document reads.

The film’s reportedly inexperienced and deeply inept armorer Hannah Gutierrez Reed, who will be tried on charges of involuntary manslaughter and tampering with evidence, told investigators that during safety training Baldwin was preoccupied with his phone:

‘A training session for at least an hour or more in length was scheduled,’ the statement says, ‘but the actual training consisted only of approximately 30 minutes as according to Reed, Baldwin was distracted and talking on his cell phone to family during the training’.

Is he a teenager? How are phones even allowed into mandatory weapons training on a film set? How were they not confiscated until training was over?

Most important: Baldwin has since maintained that the gun which killed Hutchins accidentally went off on its own, a claim two Hollywood firearms experts told me is impossible.

‘I’m not aware of any gun firing itself,’ veteran armorer Steve Wolf said. ‘The trigger still must have been pressed.’

Former FBI agent turned on-set expert Bobby Chacon agreed: ‘Bullets don’t curve. He isn’t in ‘The Matrix’. The trigger would still have to be pulled.’

The New Mexico statement of probable cause records Baldwin as admitting he ‘fired’ the gun.

Yet during a thoroughly repellent, self-pitying interview with ABC’s George Stephanopoulos in December 2021 — two months after the shooting — Baldwin had the temerity to blame Hutchins.

‘Everything is at her direction,’ Baldwin said. ‘I’m holding the gun where she told me to hold it, which ended up right below her armpit.’

But then Baldwin contradicted himself.

‘I would never point a gun at anyone,’ he said.

Either he did point the gun at Hutchins or he didn’t. There’s no margin for error here.

The film’s reportedly inexperienced and deeply inept armorer Hannah Gutierrez Reed (pictured), who will be tried on charges of involuntary manslaughter and tampering with evidence, told investigators that during safety training Baldwin was preoccupied with his phone. Is he a teenager?

The New Mexico statement of probable cause records Baldwin as admitting he ‘fired’ the gun. Yet during a thoroughly repellent, self-pitying interview with ABC’s George Stephanopoulos in December 2021, Baldwin had the temerity to blame Hutchins.

Such sloppiness extended to the entire ‘Rust’ production. The morning of the accidental shooting, seven crew members walked off set over safety concerns — namely, carelessness when it came to firearms.

One of those crewmembers sent this text to the unit production manager: ‘We’ve now had three accidental discharges. This is super unsafe.’

And finally, the question I keep coming back to: If that scene had called for Alec Baldwin to hold that gun to his head and pull the trigger, wouldn’t he have checked it himself?

This case, these charges and the outcome, really do matter.

Hutchins was a young wife and mother who lost her life due to apparent disregard for regulations. She and her survivors deserve justice.

It will also set a precedent for safety on film and TV sets, and hopefully prove that no one, not even a rich, spoiled actor, is above the law.

That in fact, given a movie star’s influence and authority, given that most crew members may be afraid to say, ‘No’, or ‘Put down your phone and pay attention to this safety meeting’ — there’s all the more reason for the famous and powerful to be held to account.

Some may say it’s enough that Baldwin surely can’t now get hired (truly, who would insure him?). Or that he’s had to price-slash his Hamptons mansion by $10 million and star in a risible promotional video to unload it.

But remember: He and his wife are the same callous people who posted happy-family pictures all over social media in the days after Halyna’s death, seemingly sparing not a thought for her traumatized young son, so bereft he was unable to speak for two days.

Here’s what Hilaria had the gall to write: ‘Parenting through this has been an intense experience, to say the least’.

That line — so heartless, so tone-deaf and foul — never fails to astonish.

Hilaria Baldwin — the ultimate internet troll — shoving her fake-perfect life and soft-core yoga poses in everyone’s faces, including the devastated Hutchins family.

Last April, after the charges against Baldwin were dropped the first time, they again turned to Instagram and posted a super-creepy picture of a barefoot Hilaria in Alec’s lap, her head on his shoulder, his eyes closed in deep satisfaction.

Shameful. Disgusting.

As was Alec’s decision to resume filming on a movie that will be forever stained with this accidental death, a movie no one wants or needs to see.

Last April, after the charges against Baldwin were dropped the first time, they turned to Instagram and posted a super-creepy picture of a barefoot Hilaria in Alec’s lap, her head on his shoulder, his eyes closed in deep satisfaction.

Alec and Hilaria Baldwin, with their insatiable need for attention and their codependent malignant narcissism, are incredibly well-matched.

These are the same people who, with this terrible cloud hanging over them, prioritize the important things. The day before Hilaria’s birthday last January, Alec went online and begged his fans to get her to one million Instagram followers.

‘It seems like she’s just centimeters shy,’ he said. ‘Would you follow her on Instagram?’

As of writing, Hilaria’s account, publicity-strut and all, remains stubbornly stuck at 995,000.

Alec potentially going to prison if found guilty is one thing. Not being able to crack a million followers on IG — now that’s surely Hilaria’s version of hell.

Or, as she would say: ¡infierno!